Perfect Picks: a weekly roundup of resources for online creatives looking to ditch perfect
Welcome to this week’s edition of Perfect Picks, my friend! Each week, I’ll share a few encouraging words + behind-the-scenes insights into my daily perfectionism journal with real-life examples of how I manage when my perfectionism pops up.
Plus, a roundup of useful and inspiring resources for online creatives and recovering perfectionists. Think: practical tips, thought-provoking blog posts + #allthethings I've been loving lately.
Let’s get to it.
perfectly imperfect Encouragement
"The longest journey you take is from your head to your heart." - Mark Nepo
If there's anything these last few months of dealing with chronic illness + a mental health crisis have taught me is how to firmly live from my heart. You see, I used to be a head-person. Even my work of teaching online creatives how to overcome their perfectionism came from reason, rationale, research, facts + frameworks.
But chronic illness doesn't care about reason and facts and all the knowledge I've collected along the way. Dealing with chronic illness is about wisdom, managing feelings and emotions + acceptance of limitations and making the best of the cards you're dealt. Basically, it's living from the heart.
As soon as I realized this, I knew I needed to go deeper in my own journey of overcoming perfectionism AND in my work of helping others do the same.
That's when ditching perfect became a lifestyle. A lifestyle of ditching those people-pleasing, approval-seeking perfectionistic ways, of unrealistic expectations + traditional notions of success. And also, ditching should's, need-to's and must-do's + prioritizing heart over hustle.
Share with me here, do you live from your head or from your heart?
Snippets from my perfectionism journal
My perfectionism showed up this week:
as feeling a little out of control with regards to my hours and combining 2 jobs.
as people pleasing and not wanting to ruffle feathers. That's not who I want to be. I want to be and behave more in integrity.
as wanting to be perfect, not make any mistakes + do everything exactly right at the start of my new job. I could have been kinder to myself, more forgiving, more aware of the harshness of my thoughts.
Snippets from my gratitude list
This week I was grateful for...
the sound of the rain clattering on the window
a rainbow through the dark grey clouds
my waterproof jacket
learning a new skill
the happy feeling of doing a good deed
an afternoon of playing board games with my family
Here’s my offering of inspiring reads for you this week. As always, take what you need.
"When you take up space with your stories, message, and ideas, you are creating a way for people to connect with you, to understand your point of view, to trust your expertise and perspective, and to feel excited and comfortable about investing in your services and/or products too."
“Who even is ‘people like me’? For me, I’m not cool, successful, likeable, generally ‘together’ enough to do those things I really want to. But if that’s the case, isn’t ‘people like me’ just, well, everyone? Don’t we all have those hang ups and unfriendly voices? And if that’s the case, then those things you want to do must be for people like you, because otherwise they’re not for anyone.”
“I rarely “do it for the ‘gram.” I don’t make my life choices based on what will look good on the internet. When I’m knee-deep in a meaningful conversation with a friend, it’s unlikely that I’ll interrupt them to take a photo of the sunset. However.”
“Letting go of perfectionism - a few years ago this would have petrified me. I felt I was strong BECAUSE of my perfectionism. Now I know I was strong DESPITE of my perfectionism.”
“The thing is, I feel like we’ve heard all this before. Women’s crafts and creativity being derided as “unintellectual”; people of relative privilege dictating how education and literature should be consumed.”
“If you want a word that hits closer to home, we’d go with brave (or badass if you’re into that). You have to be brave to leave a steady salaried job for one where you may take a huge pay cut at first. You have to be brave to put yourself and your ideas out there with the chance that it could all publicly fail. You have to be brave to walk away from a job with benefits — paid vacation, sick days, a 401k, and health insurance. You have to be brave to assert yourself and your worth in business. We’re certainly not fishing for compliments here, but being told how lucky we are implies we won a gold ticket and didn’t work for it. And that’s certainly not the case. By acknowledging that we work and fight for every single accomplishment we have, we’ll feel much more supported and understood in the moment.”
FOR MORE ENCOURAGEMENT, BEHIND-THE-SCENES SNEAK PEEKS + PERFECTIONISM-BUSTING TIPS, COME HANG OUT WITH ME ON INSTAGRAM.
Hey, Wendy here!
As a perfectionism coach, I help online creatives #ditchperfect, overcome their perfectionism + take action on the big ideas they have for their business. Let’s work together and make those ideas happen.